The feeling of disgust. Not only is it a very baseline emotion which helps keep us safe individually and, at one point, as a species - it's also the only thing that stands between reality and rationality.
Ever had that "they're just off, something isn't right" reaction to someone who was very outwardly normal? That frequently comes from instinctual disgust.
And there's no reason to limit this disturbing feeling to the things that are "icky." Intellectual and emotional disgust are always here to pick up the slack.
Much like our pupils shrinking at the sight of a nausea-inducing dumpster truck full of feces, our instincts about the people we encounter, befriend, grow close to, and become arch-enemies of can be spot on even before we know why we're correct. The tiny pieces of the picture we paint when standing before another human being makes a tremendous impression. Small cues may make it hard for some of us with social issues, but if you take a deep breathe you'll soon come to realize that you're sending and receiving messages to everyone in the room. No wifi required.
Hence the social exhaustion you may experience if you found your way to this blog.
If I have a few days in which I feel any hopefulness towards my fellow man - and to be clear, by hopefulness, I mean a bittersweet sense that maybe not everyone is terrible - it will surely soon be ruined by an onslaught of gross from social media, short encounters in markets, and in my personal life. I can be as alone as I am, as reclusive as I am, and still, someone will disgust me.
I don't always know what to do when I feel this way. Often it's a waiting game. Or it's a quick revenge. But there's always the joy of existing in the same space as someone that makes your internal organs scream "get away, get the fuck away!"
The upside to disgust and the plethora of it that I deal with is that it's often the ticking before the bomb goes off. Revulsion lets me know that even if I haven't figured it out yet, something is wrong with you. You're a con man. You're a serial killer. You're a pedophile. You like mayonnaise. Without the gut-wrenching antipathy, the loathing, the desire to punch and puke every time I look at you - the fact you're disgusting may catch me off guard!
And we cannot have that.
Dizzy
Ever had that "they're just off, something isn't right" reaction to someone who was very outwardly normal? That frequently comes from instinctual disgust.
And there's no reason to limit this disturbing feeling to the things that are "icky." Intellectual and emotional disgust are always here to pick up the slack.
Much like our pupils shrinking at the sight of a nausea-inducing dumpster truck full of feces, our instincts about the people we encounter, befriend, grow close to, and become arch-enemies of can be spot on even before we know why we're correct. The tiny pieces of the picture we paint when standing before another human being makes a tremendous impression. Small cues may make it hard for some of us with social issues, but if you take a deep breathe you'll soon come to realize that you're sending and receiving messages to everyone in the room. No wifi required.
Hence the social exhaustion you may experience if you found your way to this blog.
If I have a few days in which I feel any hopefulness towards my fellow man - and to be clear, by hopefulness, I mean a bittersweet sense that maybe not everyone is terrible - it will surely soon be ruined by an onslaught of gross from social media, short encounters in markets, and in my personal life. I can be as alone as I am, as reclusive as I am, and still, someone will disgust me.
I don't always know what to do when I feel this way. Often it's a waiting game. Or it's a quick revenge. But there's always the joy of existing in the same space as someone that makes your internal organs scream "get away, get the fuck away!"
The upside to disgust and the plethora of it that I deal with is that it's often the ticking before the bomb goes off. Revulsion lets me know that even if I haven't figured it out yet, something is wrong with you. You're a con man. You're a serial killer. You're a pedophile. You like mayonnaise. Without the gut-wrenching antipathy, the loathing, the desire to punch and puke every time I look at you - the fact you're disgusting may catch me off guard!
And we cannot have that.
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