Wednesday, July 10, 2013

I Will Dream About Your Own Dream

Last nights attempt at lucid dreaming and speaking more clearly to my sub-conscience were better than the night before, and by better I mean I knew I was dreaming and remembered to do the awake-check like I do while awake, and realized I was dreaming. I still had no ability to talk (never do in my dreams UNLESS I'm talking directly at my sub-conscience) and had little control over my actions. I did intentionally lean on a door so I could fall though it to escape a scene in the dream. 
The events in the dream, and a lot of my dreams, aren't scary in themselves, but how I feel in the dream is completely terrified. In my waking life, I'm not a particularly scared person - that I am aware of. So, ever since I was a little kid, my dreams have been nightmares, and my body and mind knows that when I go to sleep I'll be sent into fight-or-flight and have severe panic. So I have insomnia. 
I want to know what the deal with the nightmares is, so I can make them go away. 

Meeting sub-conscience in the last extremely lucid dream I had over a year ago living in NY was also terrifying. I've said before that it takes the form of Erika (some peoples take the form of famous actors or composite strangers) but it's also a dream so Erika as my sub-conscience is very...mannequin-ish. So in that first dream, I was walking with a group of (composite) strangers in and out of buildings and parties, but I was a ghost in this dream and they didn't know I was there (except one fat kid.
At one point we walk through a very, very dark area to go to another room and I see the black haired "mannequin"  but notice its eyes following me. That is when that dream became terrifying. She followed me and then later began actually speaking. Then I learned some things about myself and others. 
I stopped practicing lucidity for a few days. 

All I'm saying is that talking to the sub-conscience could make someone crazy. It's probably a good thing it takes work to have good dialogue with it because if you were to bring too much information from your sub-conscience back when you awoke, you might find something tall and fly off it. 

Since everyone has a sub-conscience, the people you interact with are a double-mask. The mask they choose for society/you, and the mask they wear themselves. The sub-conscience isn't a different person living in your mind - but it does keep a lot of things to itself if you don't make an effort to communicate with it. It's like having an indifferent stalker. 

I do find it odd that I fall asleep so quickly when repeating "I will dream about your own dream" like one lucidity method says to do. Cool cool.

Dizzy.

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